Friday, June 24, 2011

Nursery Stuff

I'm not very homemade. I can't sew, or quilt, or figure out how to make a mason jar into anything that's not just an empty mason jar. I know some people are naturals making things from other things into really cool things - I am not one of those people. In kindergarten I was the best tracer ever, but ask me to come up with a fairy land on my own and I'd draw a complete blank. Last summer the father of my child asked me to mend some of his shorts, and they now look like a blind, drunk surgeon sewed them up using his feet.

But apparently being pregnant has made me think I can do things. Creative things. Because suddenly I'm saying things like, "We don't need to buy that! I'll just MAKE IT MYSELF!" Huh? "No, don't worry about those. I'll just MAKE THEM MYSELF!" What? My non-pregnant self is going to go back in time and smack that handy little smile off my pregnant face.

But I'm still pregnant, thus I'm still tasking myself into oblivion. Or rather, I was tasking myself in an abnormally big way for someone who just wants to nap and watch Gossip Girl, when all of a sudden my sister came along and upped the ante to Code Crazy.

I was working on drawing these wall hangings for the baby's room, and my sister asked to see them. So I showed her. Because where's the harm in that?

Oh foolish, foolish me.

These are what I showed her:

(click to see bigger)

I was just planning on hanging them in three separate frames above her crib, and totally skewing the way she thinks animals look in real life. Easy. I was pretty much done. Just needed to find some cute frames and be done with it. I was almost done with a project! Yay! I never finish things!

And then, came this:

B: They're so cute!

A: Oh thanks!

B: You should put them with letters and do the whole alphabet. How cute would that be?!

A: . . .

B: A monkey, an owl, think about how cute the WHOLE ENTIRE ALPHABET WOULD BE!

Cut to me staring at my computer screen in complete rage hoping it would seep through to my sister's computer so she could feel my icy stare from a thousands of miles away.

B: And then you could write a children's book about it, and make a mobile, and some stuffed animals and blah, blah, blah. . .

Staring did not work.

The thing is, my non-pregnant self would have just ignored her flights of fancy, and gone about my Gossip-Girl-watching business, but my pregnant self was like, "Oh my gosh, the whole alphabet? That WOULD be cute! I should do that. I'll MAKE IT MYSELF!" And inside my non-pregnant self is like, "You're f*$&ing crazy."

And then even though it was late, and I was exhausted, I stayed up doing this:


Only twenty-three left to go! Gossip Girl, you'll have to wait. I have brightly colored animals to draw. And a sister to thank/stare down.


  1. Cutest dis-colored animals EVER!

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  3. I love it I love it I love it! Local artist! That's what they'll call you in the newspapers! And then people from miles around will pay you to decorate their baby rooms with the cute animals. And then you can use that money and take me out to Chili's (for the bottomless lunch, because that's how we roll).

    You are so wonderfully talented, my friend.