Tuesday, May 3, 2011

Baby Naming

Is it wrong that I sort of want to name my daughter Jack Bauer?

I know I'm years behind everyone with the whole 24 thing, but my God he's amazing. Once every few years, he stays awake for 24 hours and doesn't ever pee or eat. But does manage to stop a nuclear attack by disarming a nuke with his bare hands. (The things in italics I like to say in the movie phone guy voice. You know, the "In a world. . . " voice.)

He's honest, strong, mentally sharp as a nuclear physicist and a Navy Seal combined, and always looks good when he's killing bad guys. If my daughter doesn't want to be named after someone like that then I don't know what to do.

I'm not saying that's what we're going to do. I'm just saying we're thinking about it.

And by "we" I mean the father of my baby in response to my suggestion just said, "Do we have any cream cheese?" But his eyes said, "Over my dead body."

Oh that can be arranged Captain Cream Cheese. I've watched 7 seasons. I've seen Jack put people in a sleeper hold at least 16 times. You won't actually be dead, but you'll look it until the exact moment I'm out of the building and out of the line of danger, at which point you'll regain consciousness discover I'm gone, and shake your fist in fury! But don't worry, me and pretty little Jack Bauer will come back for you. Someone's got to teacher her how to throw a baseball. (And kill someone while doing it.)

Needless to say, we are having some naming issues. How does anyone pick a name? When I was in High School I wanted to name my daughter Diagony. Dia-go-ny. THAT'S NOT EVEN A WORD.

My friend Kevin has started calling her Kevina, which is now kinda growing on me.

The unfortunate thing is the only names I love are boys names. And for some reason, tv boy's names. Like Jack Bauer, or David Brent, or Alec Baldwin.

So don't be surprised if four months from now you get an announcement with a picture of a chubby little girl with the caption, "Introducing our little bundle of joy! Baby girl Conan!"

Sure it'll cause some problems in the classroom, but no one is ever going to forget her name that's for sure.

1 comment:

  1. Jaqueline Bauer would be okay, right? You could call her "Jack" for short (which would be awesome -- what's more adorable than a little girl in overalls and pigtails who's all, "My name is Jack!")

    And I love you, and I would be so honored, but if you *do* end up naming her Kevina . . . I will weep.