Special Time

A good way to make sure the kids wake up early from their nap is to break out the cross stitch, get yourself all situated, and happy, maybe a cozy blanket around your legs and a fun little stitchy-stitch in front of you, needle all threaded and whatnot, because the second you're ready to start - BLAMO! It's cry city.

On a similar note breaking out the cross stitch is also a good way to never get laid.

But does that stop me? Nooooooooooo. Because I have a Memento-like memory for what makes my babies wake up and what makes people not want to make-out with me.  For instance, I also still insist on cutting off my hair and starting a really good book.

Oh, you're comfy? WELL, WE'RE AWAKE THEN!

Along those lines, something weird happened the other day.  My sleeping partner and I found ourselves with a rare moment of quiet to ourselves and decided to catch up on some cuddling and Duck Dynasty.  Mid-way through Duck Dynasty though Josh's armpits started sweating all over me.  Now, it was a warm day, but not that warm, and he had just taken a shower, so I let it go and kept watching Uncle Sal be crazy.

But it was getting worse, and it was totally weird because Josh is not a sweaty guy even while he's working out but I didn't want to ruin the cuddly moment, so I kept quiet, but I just kept thinking to myself, What the hell is going on? Maybe he has a thyroid problem? Did he eat something really spicy right before we sat down? I should call the doctor and see if he has a thyroid problem.  Wait, does your thyroid make you sweat? Maybe it's lymph nodes.  A gland. It's some sort of gland.  I'll have the doctor check all his glands.  Maybe it was extra water caught in his armpit hair from the shower? Oh my god how much armpit hair does he have!? That's probably a follicle problem all that armpit hair. None on his head and they all ended up in his armpits to hold onto water like some sort of weird armpit-rain-forest.

Finally I couldn't take it anymore and sat up.

"Why are you so sweaty?" he asked before I could say anything.

"Why are YOU so sweaty?"

And then we both looked down to our sopping wet shirts.

Turns out, it was not Josh at all.  I had fantastically leaked breast milk all over both of us during our cuddle sesh and didn't even know.  I was literally laying in a puddle of my own breast milk.

HAWT.

This is why I don't understand how single moms do it.  How are you supposed to date when you can potentially leak bodily fluids onto your date?

The good news is Josh does not have any sort of thyroid, glandular or nodular problems.  He also is kind enough to stay silent while he thought I was sweating all over him, and I him.

The magic is not gone, people!  We still love each other enough to watch tv with each other covered in sweat.  Or breast milk as the case may be.

Tula thinks it's funny.  Until she realizes that's her food I just bathed in.

Addie had a really good hair day the other day.