Before eating an apple remove sticker. Don't just say to self, "Oh look, sticker. Will not remove now. Will stop eating before consume sticker. Am not dumb."
Self is always wrong.
I just looked at the apple core of my snack and realized there had been a sticker on there before I ate it, now. . . sticker is most likely decorating the wall of my stomach along with many other apple stickers, some gum from like 7 years ago, and a note I once ate so no one could read the super secret secrets I had written on it. I was like 8. It was probably something about how I'd just learned the word "butt" was hysterical.
I wonder what else I'm missing while I'm eating.
(almost better than Hammer time)
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